‘Tis the voice of the lobster

Alice recites this to the Gryphon and the Mock Turtle:

‘Tis the voice of the Lobster: I heard him declare
“You have baked me too brown, I must sugar my hair.”
As a duck with its eyelids, so he with his nose
Trims his belt and his buttons, and turns out his toes.
When the sands are all dry, he is gay as a lark,
And will talk in contemptuous tones of the Shark;
But, when the tide rises and sharks are around,
His voice has a timid and tremulous sound.

I passed by his garden, and marked, with one eye,
How the Owl and the Panther were sharing a pie:
The Panther took pie-crust, and gravy, and meat,
While the Owl had the dish as its share of the treat.
When the pie was all finished, the Owl, as a boon,
Was kindly permitted to pocket the spoon;
While the Panther received knife and fork with a growl,
And concluded the banquet by — *

[*Alice's recitation is suddenly interrupted by the Mock Turtle, who finds the poem "the most confusing thing I ever heard"]

Lewis Carroll’s light verses are the best sort of nonsensical fun. I particularly admire his skill in parody and absurd turn of phrase (“You have baked me too brown,  I must sugar my hair.“) You can almost see the vain little lobster twisting and turning in front of his mirror, twirling his feelers into place.. it makes you smile.

The verse above is a take on Isaac Watt’s (1674 – 1748) highly conscientious poem, ” The Sluggard”:

‘Tis the voice of the sluggard; I heard him complain,
“You have waked me too soon, I must slumber again.”
As the door on its hinges, so he on his bed,
Turns his sides and his shoulders and his heavy head.

“A little more sleep, and a little more slumber;”
Thus he wastes half his days, and his hours without number,
And when he gets up, he sits folding his hands,
Or walks about sauntering, or trifling he stands.

I pass’d by his garden, and saw the wild brier,
The thorn and the thistle grow broader and higher;
The clothes that hang on him are turning to rags;
And his money still wastes till he starves or he begs.

I made him a visit, still hoping to find
That he took better care for improving his mind:
He told me his dreams, talked of eating and drinking;
But scarce reads his Bible, and never loves thinking.

Said I then to my heart, “Here’s a lesson for me,”
This man’s but a picture of what I might be:
But thanks to my friends for their care in my breeding,
Who taught me betimes to love working and reading.

cause it’s cheap-cheap, cheap-cheap

Despite being a marketing graduate and knowing how these things work, I still give into the YAY! of sales.

Starbucks Pastries High School

One day, Nabs and I were at a Starbucks.

While we were trying to make the quick, firm decision of what to munch on (which means we took forever), we realised that the pastries were like cliques in cafeteria in high school.

I can’t remember exactly what we said, but here’s the gist:

The Atypical ABC

Mean girls trio huddled (right), whispering,

“Hey, did you see that weird kid. He’s like so strange.”
“And he smells funny *giggle* “
“I don’t want to sit so near him; he might make my hair (almonds?) stink too! Like eeeewww…”

The Lascivious Lovers
Left bun: ” Oh my darling, oh my hunny bun.. *snuggles*
Right bun: ” Mmmmm.mmmmmmmmmmmmm…”

The Cuckoo Club

“Ooops, no space for you.. ! Bye now! “

[videos] KYTV: P.O.P :: Singapore

photos here & here

The troops rallied on 6th June, and it was a good, fine day at the esplanade doing KYTV:P.O.P nonsense. Our singing more or less sucked, our dancing – some, at least – drew inspiration from the Great Singapore Workout (so you can imagine how that went), but the making of it was INCREDIBLY fun.

It was a ball of a time prancing around in weird-ass costumes and lip-syncing to the recording. I laughed so hard during the whole process I think I developed abs.

How it worked:

1. Choose your POPstar name
2. Pick the original song for your solo/duet/group: Angry Song, Love Duet, Obscure Song, Happy Song…
3. Learn your song via the separate tellies & headphones set up for each song (we never really made it..heh)
4. Record your song in the studio.
5. Head over to the makeup/dress up station to muck around with the nice people
6. Wait for your turn to shoot your MTV against a green screen
7. Say “thank you”!
8. Sober up over the next few days and cringe over your video when it appears

So thanks to shal, nab, erfen, jonny, chris g, juliane, su & jie for coming down.. not to mention the bishy-bashy and bowling session that happened later. Oh yes, and the NOBODY by wonder girls impromptu cover we did.

(L-R) erfen, me, shal, jonny, nab, juliane

And here are the videos:

J. the Wicked-Witch-from-the East-who-had-to -settle-for-purple-sequins-because-it’s-the-recession-and-black-cloth-was-expensive & the Great Singapore Workout back-up dancers

Angsty boys : Ch(Tr)is G. & E.Dilly Daddy

Still angsty: schoolmates indra, terrix & helen

schoolmates: raphael & mike

Weird rooster-disco girl S. & SuperPinkBather N.

Happy Spankers, Lime-light Grabbers

OBENTO, OBENTO

AND THIS IS HOW IT GOES…..

Last month, I was poor.

When one is poor, one buys big bag of cheap pasta on SALE.
One smiles at Father to buy nice turkey ham and honey-baked ham.
One also smiles at Father and promises to tidy up toilet, as one throws lemon, tomatoes, corn and fresh button mushrooms sneakily into NTUC basket.

Then,
One whips up large pot of olive-oil pasta to feed:

• Small, small army of not-so-hungry men, or
• Single hungry person for many many days

Following Option 2,
Bento is packed with shiny fork(-lette, since it is a tiny, young fork) and fruit.
Bento is brought to work for 4 consecutive lunches. (good Lord)
Bento looks like __(see above picture)__

One is very proud of oneself for saving $$ and cooking something I actually didn’t die upon.

THE END

 

ODE TO MY FRINGE

O fringe,
O fringe,
Where hast thou gone?

Analysis: Speaker no longer has a long fringe.

Cut down
Thou wast,
By a savage hand;
Not in pride by fair Apollo’s light,
But by crooked stealth in the dead of night.

Analysis: Fringe was cut in the middle / “dead” of the night – one guesses about 1 a.m – by an amaturer hand. Probably the speaker’s. Highly likely to be due to stress, thus “savage”. Stress from studying, working, trying to reach dreams, smelling the loo, etc, etc. A lack of skill results in a jagged fringe, i.e. “crooked”.

Ah!

While some lament thy death, thine absence,
Thy cursèd usurper chortles in glee -
A veritable copy of Pluck’s own face,
“THE BANGS” , they art named,
Hath conquered the day.

 Analysis: Speaker’s partial regret after destroying her fringe or perhaps speaker’s friends appallment upon first seeing it. Bangs is personified. Seems to have taken a life of its own. BANGS, obviously, DOES NOT CARE. Bangs is just happy it is there.

Alas,
Fare thee well, beloved fringe,
Journey bravely through River Styx,
The day will come when we will be reunited,
Till then, prayest thy grows unstoppered.

 Analysis: Bye-bye fringe who is en route to Hair Heaven. When the hair grows long again, the fringe will be “reincarnated”.

 ______________________

Final note of critical analysis: 
Poetry of such shining CRAPtitude is few and far between. 

 

 

the required link by flickr